I have been married for 7 years now, and I will tell you that I am happy with my marriage, but before I got married I was afraid of marriage because of the experience I saw by those around me, so I was thinking that marriage was very bad then for that reason there was no need for me to get married.
Despite being happy in my own marriage, I am still afraid of marriage because of things I have seen in other people's marriages.
Ladies and gentlemen, to be honest with you, my greatest marital fear today, although I am not facing it but is happening in other people's marriages, are things like:
A married person goes back to their ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend after getting married to someone they said they truly love and want to spend their entire life with. Almost every one of us is married to someone else's girlfriend or boyfriend, including my wife. She wasn't a virgin when I married her, so automatically she has an ex-boyfriend. Her boyfriend sometimes calls her on the phone. I will get angry with her and have warned her not to allow the guy to destroy our marriage, because I can't be in a marriage with someone who says that her emotional thoughts about romantic feelings are going for someone else, but I am with her as her all in all.
Please, no matter how much you loved your ex-boyfriend or your ex-girlfriend before you got married to your current partner because you are not married to your former partner, cut off every communication unless you don't want a peaceful and happy marriage with your current partner.
Even if you married your current partner because your ex wasn't ready for marriage when you were ready and, unfortunately, your current partner was ready for marriage, then you left your ex to marry your present partner, focus on your marriage and forget about whatever memory of love you have shared with your ex.
Another greatest fear I have about marriage is when I unknowingly offend my wife. Instead of her telling me immediately that I had done something wrong to her, she would start avoiding me, no more talking to me to the extent of sleeping in a separate bed until I approached her, start begging her to tell me what I did that's making her act that way against me. It will take a whole day before she starts opening up to me. I have wondered what will happen if I decide not to ask her. Will she divorce me or report to our parents? The answer I don't know.
Nobody is 100%a good character, so when you are offended by your partner, in a romantic manner, let the person know how you feel hurt regarding their actions, instead of I don't care about treatment.
Here's my fear again:
My wife gave a stranger she met in the market her phone number. Yes, it was the man that asked for it, I know, but this triggered fear in me that she's planning to go to another man while we are not having any problem in our marriage.
Think About it? Why should a married woman give out her phone number to another man knowing too well that she's married? This is how infidelity starts. From pleasant greetings on the phone to romantic conversation, then the man would start giving her gifts. Next thing he would invite her to his house or book a hotel room for them to meet and make love. It doesn't happen in one day or in one week, but that's how it happens.
As a married woman of honor, who's submitted, loyal and humble to her husband, resisting the devil, creates boundaries, don't give your number to any man unless you want to destroy your marriage by yourself, and the funniest thing is that the man that's coming for you is just after your body not that he wants to marry you, if you divorce your man he will not marry you, he's just using you to cash cruise.
Work for the success of your marriage, not the downfall. This message is directed to everyone.
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